七夕:我们该如何约会
Struggling to meet someone new? Following these simple yet insightful dating rules might be just be exactly what you need.
正在为和新朋友约会而发愁吗?照着以下这些见解非凡的简单法则去做的话,收获可能会超出你的期待。
Love Yourself First
首先要爱自己
Have you ever noticed that happy people get more attention? And if you are happy with yourself, it shows. So in order to attract more people into your life for dating purposes, focus on the things that make you happy. Try writing a large piece of paper full of ideas that you can use in a pinch, such as taking a hot bath, going for a bike ride or filling your home with plants. Then, pick three items from this list every day with conscious effort, knowing that the time you take tending to increasing your own personal joy will increase the pull others feel to learn more about who you are.
你是否注意到快乐的人更能吸引别人的注意呢?如果你自己感到快乐的话,就能收获更多的快乐。所以为了吸引更多人和你约会,努力让自己快乐起来吧。试着在一张纸上写满能让你快乐的主意,如泡个热水澡,骑车,将家里摆满盆栽植物。然后,每天在这张清单上挑三种方法,用心地去照着做,要知道你花在让自己快乐的时间越多,你就越能吸引别人想要更多的了解你。
Review Your Relationship Expectations
重新审视你对这段关系的期待
If you shake your head within seconds of meeting someone, rank them against a checklist in your head, or have stringent guidelines about who you will and won't meet, it is time to revamp your relationship expectations. When trying to meet someone new, it is imperative that you let go of your preconceived notions about who the perfect partner is.
如果你因为想到要和某人约会而摇头的话,将他们列入黑名单,或者如果对你想和谁不和谁约会有严格的标准划分的话,你就要开始重新修订你对约会的期望了。当你尝试去认识新朋友的时候,当务之急是你要抛开谁是你的最佳朋友的偏见。
Cut Ties To Your Ex
断绝与前女友的联系
Although this dating rule may be contentious for some readers, it is still an important step in the dating process. Just like a spring cleaning clears your space of clutter and cobwebs, removing an ex still present in your life after a breakup can free you to meet someone new. Of course there are circumstances where this may not be possible - such as if you have children together or work in the same office. But whenever possible, you need to remove your ex from your personal life, even if it is only temporary.
也许有些读者对这个建议有争议,但是这在约会中仍然是很重要的事情。就好像给你关系网中错综复杂的关系来个大扫除一样,与前任断绝关系的话可以给你重新开始的机会。当然了,也有些情况是不能这样做的,比如你们共同抚养小孩,或者在同一个办公室工作。但是只要有可能的话,你都要让前任从你的私生活中消失,哪怕是暂时性这样做也可以。
Let Go of Dating Myths
根除关于约会的荒诞想法
Dating is exhausting and not worth my time. I'll never meet The One. All the good ones are taken.
约会是很累的,不值得我浪费时间。我永远碰不到合适的人。好的人都名花有主了。
These three statements are myths about dating that seriously require thought if they are going through your head. Dating isn't about negative thoughts; its about meeting as many interesting people as you can while having faith that you'll meet someone special.
这三个关于约会的想法是荒诞的,你要想想自己是否真的认真考虑过了。约会不是消极的,带着你终究会遇到对的人的想法,尽量和很多有趣的人约会。
Following this dating rule means you need to stop focusing on the person you are trying to meet, and focus on the spotlight instead on yourself.
照着这些约会准则做的话就意味着你不能再一味地想着要找某个特定的人,而要将关注的重点放在自己身上。
Face Your Dating Fears
直面自己的约会恐惧
Feeling anxious or upset about the prospects of meeting someone new usually translates into fear. If the thoughts of never meeting someone special, being upset that your last partner refused to commit, or convincing yourself you aren't worth dating are taking over your thought processes, it is time to face your dating fears. By not following this dating rule and ignoring the issues, your inability to risk losing your heart will stop you from meeting someone special.
为要和某个人开始约会而感到焦虑不安或难过的话就是恐惧。你总是认为自己碰不到特别的人的话,为了你所认为的合适对象的拒绝而难过,或者总是认为自己不值得约会,是时候将这些想法抛到一边去了。如果你不照着这些约会规则,并且无视这些的话,你永远不会随着自己的心找到那个特别的人。
Learn How To Flirt
学会调情
To attract new people, you'll need to show them you are interested - which means learning how to flirt. Virtually every single first encounter that leads to more starts with a smile, so this dating rule suggests smiling at everyone you encounter, without qualification. As well, understanding body language is a crucial part of meeting someone new and cannot be overlooked.
为了吸引新朋友,你要向他们展示你的风趣,这就是说你要学会调情。实际上,当两个单身的人相遇的时候,都是从微笑开始的,然后才有下一步的发展,所以我们建议你对你遇到的每个人都无条件展开微笑。另外,懂得身体语言在与别人发展新关系中也是很重要的,不容忽视的。
Accept All Dates
接受所有的约会
If you want to follow the rules of dating to meet someone new, its time to stop making snap decisions about the people who ask you out for a date. If someone asks you for coffee, it is your responsibility to accept it, barring any issues with safety of course. A date is just a date - not a marriage proposal. It'll only take an hour or two, and by accepting all dates you'll move closer to meeting someone special while perfecting your notions of what kind of person you'd like to have in your life.
如果你想按照这些约会规则去和新朋友约会的话,那么就是时候不要再对向你提出约会的人挑三拣四了。如果有人邀请你一起去喝杯咖啡的话,你就接受,当然是在安全的情况下。一次约会仅仅是一次约会罢了,不是求婚。只会占用你一到两个小时的时间,而且接受所有的约会的话,你就离遇到那个特别的人更近了,因为通过多次约会,你就更能清楚地明白什么人才是你想要共度一生的人。
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